When I auditioned for Two gentlemen of Verona I wanted so badly to be a part of it. I loved the story, I loved the music! I wanted in!! I thought if I played any role it would be Sylvia! I love her songs, she's sassy, she just spoke to me:) I never, ever, ever, thought I'd play Julia. Sometimes I'd skip her songs because I just didn't get it. When Scott called me to tell me that he wanted me to play Julia.....there was joy, shock, fear....overwhelming excitement!!!! I was nervous, I didn't know what to expect but I knew this was a major role. I knew I had to bring it and I didn't want to disappoint.
Julia is complex!! I remember when I didn't understand her and so I tried to make her into this character I wanted to play. Thank God for Scott!! He helped me early on and throughout by helping me discover...it's not who you want her to be, it's about learning who she really is and finding yourself within her. That hit me like a ton of bricks!! I realized that I was short-changing her by trying to glam her up and to let her be the rich, complex, interesting, emotional mess she is. It wasn't until I started relating to her that it became real.
Day by day I realized she speaks to me in so many different ways, as does Sylvia, but Julia does more so and in more challenging ways. Ways I hate to admit, ways I try to mask, deep ways. Like me, Julia is naive, defiant, a sucker for jerks, dependent upon relationships etc. It's been therapeutic to find myself through her on that stage. Julia has an intense relationship with the audience and her story is not told through song alone or even just within the text...You've got to see it!!! I am overjoyed that I get to bring her to life, a whole new life through my eyes. It makes me feel all warm inside to see people enjoy it. To know people feel for her, shake their head at her, scold her, side with her, take the journey with her.
This journey has been a blast, an intimate, developing relationship between actor and character. I have learned so much. I have been given so much great advice, the best of which was never to look like your acting because really, your not, you are living it!! That changes everything and I think as a cast we do that....well!! We have completely immersed ourselves in this wacky world. We cherish it. We adore it. We live it. It is ours!!
This is all fairly new to me. My first acting experience was on a whim. I was in high school a friend of mine was auditioning for a play and wanted me to come along. I said what the hell, memorized the monologue, performed it and wound up getting cast. After that I did a musical or two, nothing major and after high school that was that. 2010's new year's resolutions came about and one of them was to do more with my voice. My boyfriend at that time was in a men's barbershop chorus and so I joined a women's chorus and auditioned for their front line....looooooved it!! It just left me wanting more. He did theatre and so I decided to audition for some things. My first audition....New Line Theatre's Wild Party. Looking back that audition was absolutely horrendous, I sang a song out of context, tripped all over my feet, it was just bad :/ so of course I was NOT cast!! Though disappointing I didn't want to give up. I started planning better, soliciting advice, preparing and practicing and my next few auditions went well...adding fuel to the fire called passion.
When I would tell people I was an actor I would laugh a little on the inside because it never felt real to me. This role has given me the opportunity to discover and express so many emotions. It's challenged me to act from within even when you feel like a character is nothing like you. It's provided me with the priceless reward of being able to say "I am an actor!" with confidence and pride. I've taken everything I've learned from Julia to share with you all. The experience has been emotional and it's hard to explain how I feel in words, luckily I get to express it through this lovely art form and I can't draw or paint or anything artsy like that and so it's nice to take pride in my performance :) it's an inner/outer body experience that's almost tantric!!
I love the response when people talk to us after the show. You can see the joy on their faces. When I hear "fantastic performance!" from critics and especially peers it's a savory treat. As a new performer that just ROCKS MY WORLD!!! It's great to be a part of something great!! I'm so happy, so grateful, so satisfied, so ready for weekends to come :)
